What happened to Toby in This is Us?

Though This is Us centers on the Pearson family, many fans of the heart-wrenching drama are still #TeamToby – with the series now available on Netflix, here’s what you need to know about what happened to Toby Damon.

Netflix has all the power to catapult a series back into the conversation. After all, the streaming giant pioneered the concept of binge-watching, so when it obtains the rights for a show and drops all seasons in one place, it’s too tempting not to give them a revisit. 

Perhaps there’s no better example of this phenomenon than the unprecedented success of Suits last summer, which broke all kinds of streaming records when eight out of its nine seasons arrived on Netflix. 

We’ve also seen the same happen with Friends and Young Sheldon, and now subscribers are tuning into This is Us, all six seasons of which are now on the streamer. But what exactly happened to one of its main characters, Toby?

What happened to Toby in This is Us?

Toby Damon, portrayed by actor Chris Sullivan, doesn’t die – but his marriage to Kate Pearson does. Although their marriage doesn’t work out, a flash forward shows the pair remained amicable after their divorce, and they have a lot of love for each other, co-parenting their children together. Toby finds love again with a woman named Laura (Alexis Krause).

While it seemed like Toby and Kate might make it, Season 6 showed more rifts in their marriage as they tried to make long distance work. They go to couples’ therapy, but despite their best efforts, they eventually get a divorce. Toby ends up with Laura, while Kate marries her co-worker Philip (Chris Geere).

In the Season 6 finale, Toby comforts Kate at Rebecca’s funeral, saying: “If it’s okay with you, I would like to say three things that will surely cross multiple ex-husband lines and protocols.” After getting the go-ahead, he continues: “Number one, she was extraordinarily proud of you. 

“I am extraordinarily proud of you. That was number two. They get progressively more and more intense as we go. The third one is a real doozy… I love you, kid. I love you, and even though our marriage didn’t go the distance, if Doc Brown showed up right now and offered me a ride in the DeLorean, I would go right back to that weight loss support group and make stupid faces at you.”

Goddammit, This is Us – the writers never miss when it comes to bringing on the tears. Speaking to Entertainment Weekly about the breakdown of Katoby – and what life lessons can be garnered from the arc – Sullivan said: “I mean, it is possible for people to love each other and for them to not be a good couple. It’s possible for people to be a couple and not love each other. 

NBC

“The thing with Toby and Kate is, it should be a canary in the coal mine for people to process and treat and navigate their traumas before they get into a relationship. There’s enough stress on a relationship as it is, in a partnership sense. So it is of the utmost importance to come to that relationship as much of a fully formed person as possible. And that means dealing with hard stuff and facing that stuff, instead of dumping it on someone else or expecting somebody else to heal you. 

“So I think the two of them had a lot of traumas in their past and they were kind of unraveling and they did their best to work on it, but they’re not well-practiced at identifying their emotions and communicating them calmly and clearly, so that’s gonna be a problem.”

He added, “In saying goodbye to the relationship, you can say goodbye to the show itself. But the thing I keep wanting to say and wanting people to hear is: nothing is meant to last forever, including this show. But we are meant to take away lessons from every life experience, including this show. So this show has taught people about themselves, about what they do well, and what they need to improve.”

Alongside his relationship with Kate, Toby’s backstory is poignant and revealing, having faced struggles with mental health, including battling depression and managing his weight. In his childhood, Toby’s challenges set the stage for his complex development. Ultimately, the This is Us character is shaped by a compelling backstory, his humor, and the relatability of his struggles.