Man sparks debate after lashing out at girlfriend for making 34th birthday cake wrong

Alice Sjöberg
Man upset over birthday cake

A man has sparked a debate online after asking the internet if he was in the wrong when he lashed out at his girlfriend for not making the birthday cake he wanted.

One of Reddit’s most popular subreddits is the “Am I the a**hole” section, where people share stories from their lives, usually regarding arguments or conflicts, to ask if they were in the right or not.

With stories varying from anything between cheating and wedding planning to having interactions with “Karens,” you never know what you’ll read next.

In a now-viral post with over 11,000 comments, the original poster, who goes by the handle Throwaway5829582999, asked other Reddit users if he was in the wrong after getting disappointed after his girlfriend made him a chocolate birthday cake, but not in the way he wanted.

Man gets disappointed with birthday cake from girlfriend

OP started the post by saying that for his birthday, his girlfriend offered to bake him a cake. He told her what he wanted: a chocolate cake with chocolate icing. Nothing fancy, just a classic chocolate cake.

He went on to say that his girlfriend made him what he wanted — but she took some creative liberties and added vanilla icing between the two layers of chocolate cake before covering it in chocolate frosting.

“She is usually a great baker, and I guess she thought that wasn’t sophisticated enough or something,” OP wrote in the post.

After his girlfriend asked if he was disappointed, OP told her the truth and said it wasn’t the cake he requested. He continued: “If I wanted vanilla in a cake, I would have asked for vanilla in the cake.

“I didn’t make a scene. I didn’t pout. I even ate half of a slice – the chocolate part,” he wrote.

The girlfriend got upset and confused, as she said she’d made the vanilla frosting before and that OP had liked it, to which he said he did like vanilla frosting, but that it wasn’t what he had wanted.

“Her feelings were hurt, and she even pulled an ‘I’m not going to make you any cake next year,’ which I replied with, ‘I will order my own and get my money back if they don’t do it like I want it,'” OP wrote.

That was the final straw, as the girlfriend asked the OP to leave. She later told him that he embarrassed her in front of her kids. OP also revealed the girlfriend is now refusing to answer his messages.

“I think birthdays are important things, and I feel like I was honest with her when she asked me. I didn’t want to lie about it,” OP wrote. “My friend told me I should have been grateful that she made me a cake at all, especially one that I’ve eaten and liked in the past. Maybe I overreacted a bit, though I don’t feel like I did, and hope to get a second opinion. AITA here?”

Readers are conflicted about who’s in the wrong

In an unexpected turn of events, this post has left social media divided. Most of Reddit rallied in support of the OP’s girlfriend, while many on X (formerly known as Twitter) surprisingly took the OP’s side.

One person commented on the Reddit thread, saying: “YTA. Not necessarily for saying the cake wasn’t what you wanted, although I would have kept my mouth shut, but for the way you spoke to her. It’s so incredibly rude and disrespectful.”

Another wrote: Imagine someone going out of their way and baking you a cake and being a complete a** over it. When people do you a favor, you’re GRATEFUL. YTA, I can’t believe this is even a question.”

However, as the post made it over to X, one person commented in favor of OP and said: “Asking someone what they want, having them answer specifically, making something different, and then monitoring their reaction is passive-aggressive.”

After reading the responses, OP revealed he’d realized that he could have handled things better and has apologized to his girlfriend – but is now expecting an apology back.

About The Author

Alice is the Entertainment Evergreen Specialist at Dexerto, whose expertise include social media, internet culture, and Reality TV. She is a NCTJ qualified journalist that previously worked in local news before moving on to entertainment news with OK! Magazine and a wide variety of other publications. You can contact Alice at alice.sjoberg@dexerto.com