With so many people working from home at the moment, CEO of 100 Thieves, Matthew ‘Nadeshot’ Haag took the opportunity to turn their $30m Cash App office into a racetrack for an episode of “crash the compound” with predictably hilarious results.
In a bid to find out “who the fastest racers are at 100 Thieves” Nadeshot pits 5 team members head-to-head in the ultimate office-based race. Each racer represented an individual department, battling it out for the glory of being crowned the fastest competitor in the office.
While many people would think of an office-based racetrack as a simple, largely flat affair; Nadeshot took things over-the-top in typical 100 Thieves style to create the “Formula 100.”
Mixing go-karts, obstacle courses, and sporting challenges, the Formula 100 is about as crazy as office-based sports can get.
100 Thieves “Formula 100” race
Watching over the contest, Nadeshot goes through each of the competitors and their departments before reaching Logan from content, saying “he better not disappoint, because I’ll bust his ass if he does!”
Jackson was first up representing the ‘leadership’ team. Smashing through the course, Jackson managed to bust a few go-kart drifts and even ran over his own mic. Despite stopping to retrieve it, he still posted a “solid” time of 1:22 as the benchmark to beat.
JHB from ‘marketing’ went for a much more calm approach than Jackson, with Nadeshot ripping into his form saying he wasn’t “aggressive enough” and taunting him for not having a license yet. Eventually posting a time of 1:48, Nade wasn’t sure if the time would “hold up” to competitors.
Unfortunately for Kelsey from partnerships, “anything that can go wrong, did go wrong” during her run. Getting stuck on obstacles, smashing cones and accruing penalty points meant that she posted a time of 1:57 after a disastrous run.
“Killer instincts” weren’t enough for Cody
Cody showed off his “killer instincts” at the start of his run, before throwing it all away in the second half. Saying that his football shot “looked good” despite missing,
Nadeshot commented “nothing looked good about that” before Cody got stuck in the tunnel. Posting an eventual time of 2:48, it seems that Jackson was the one to beat.
Unfortunately, Logan was unable to beat Jackson’s time, but he was the closest one to it, posting a time of 1:31. Having watched the course “enough times to know it” Nadeshot then took to the track himself to try and knock Jackson off the top spot.
Sadly even Nadeshot himself couldn’t topple Jackson from the podium. Having scuffed his shot on the ‘HBR Park’ football section, Nade shouted “I put it in, I make the rules, put it in!” Sadly even that didn’t stop him from being slower than Jackson.
Announcing Jackson’s victory, Nade said “I’m the only person that’s going to be celebrating me today… Jackson, you win… Goddamnit!”